17
Abby Aguilar
I still feel worthless
Like I'm not worth
An education
Or a family that hears me walk and talk
Or the teachers that try so hard to
Encourage
A failure
That doesn't know where she's going
Or what she's doing
It’s as if I'm breathing
In an apocalypse of teens
That feel everything but happiness;
In a world where drugs,
Pain,
And masking your emotions
Seems more natural rather than expressing them.
Where losing friends
Is so much easier
Than gaining them,
And now I'm stuck here wondering
If I'm the problem or if they are.
No sight of a path that is supposably “visible”
At the age of seventeen
I want to break my bad habits
But my sadness and anxiety
Stiffen the need to change
That cigarettes are more useful than attempting
To talk to people
Who never listen
December
I lost someone I could never replace
That will always be with me
But is no longer here physically
I don't know what I'm doing
Or where I'm going
Or why I'm here
Maybe eighteen will be better
But for now
Let the tears explain the growing pains